Jan 09 2009
Because what’s funnier than deriding James Frey?
In an interview with Stephen Elliot at therumpus.net:
James Frey: It was fun [writing Bright Shiny Morning]. The most fun to write of the three books. I started at the beginning and just went. No outline, no idea of what was coming next until I did it. I knew the three protagonists, and had an idea of the structure, but nothing else. Coming after all the bullshit related to A Million Little Pieces, nobody was expecting anything from me. No publisher, no agent, no one. Just me and the book. It was great.
Oh the joys of having no publisher, no agent, no respect.
I think James Frey is probably the person I most enjoy making fun of. Other than Oprah when she makes a really dumb/unfortunately endorsement and when she does it again. Now, every time a book/memoir/historical account/speech/general discussion includes any mistruth, Frey’s name gets thrown in for good measure. I love that.
If I were Frey I’d love it too. No phone calls, no readers, no friends… “I love the process of being alone in a room,” Frey says.
Unfortunately he does still have the readers. Not to mention “some huge crowds, a small riot in LA, and some empty houses.” The huge crowds were throwing spoiled vegetables and the riot was… well, rioting. Too bad he couldn’t get the angry mobs out everywhere.
There are too many great parts to this interview. Forgive me for editorializing in brackets. I can’t help myself.
Frey: Yeah. I’m about to start [a new book]. I just finished an outline. First time I’ve outlined a book. [I’m shocked. Shocked!]
SE: You know you’re going to throw half that outline away though. [I bet there was some stuff in there that was actually true. You better toss it.]
Frey: Ha. Probably. But it was good to do it. It helped me focus. […on what NOT to write.]
Oh wait, it gets better:
SE: Now this is a book about a man, a carpenter.
Frey: It’s the third book of the Bible, called The Final Testament of the Holy Bible. My idea of what the Messiah would be like if he were walking the streets of New York today. What would he believe? What would he preach? How would he live? With who?
SE: I remember you saying he would perform gay marriages.
Frey: Absolutely.
SE: And he would live with a prostitute.
Frey: Love is love.
No need for editorializing there! And best of all, no need for research!
One last piece. Really.
SE: I was worried about you [during the MLP fiasco].
Frey: It wasn’t fun. But I’ve been through worse. [like a root canal without Novocaine. Oh wait, that was the part I made up. I even confuse myself!]
Ok, back to me. Me, me, ME! it’s been a heck of a long time since I worked on my book and I don’t even remember half of the important changes I wanted to make. I have recorded messages on my cell phone, emails to myself, pieces of chapters on my desktop, pieces of chapter on my laptop, and highlighted notes throughout the book. What a mess. All day I’ve been craving a whole day alone in a Starbucks so I can totally immerse myself. In fact I seem to be channeling Frey. “Just me and the book. It was great, no really great. Because I like myself more than the rest of you smart asses.” What a jerkhead.
I’d probably be an even more effective critic if I read his book… but I know already that’s more effort than it’s worth. Ugh… I just hate him as a human being. I hate his voice. I hate his face. He’s just a “bucket of yuck” (Dane Cook sometimes uses better descriptions than writers…). LOL.